The case for discretion, the case for disclosure, and the middle path

According to WebMD Health Services, 45% of women in management and executive roles conceal their menopause symptoms at work, and 34% have considered leaving their jobs for that reason. Those figures describe a familiar figure: a woman juggling a health reality and a professional reputation at once, with no guidebook for either. Choosing whether to speak up isn't really about personal character. It's a matter of strategy, and the best move depends on where you stand. Go through the ten statements below to find out where you currently stand.

The bill

Answer each statement yes or no, then count your yeses.

Item 1. The way I come across at work has shifted because of my symptoms, and someone who knows me well would notice the change.

Item 2. Across the past three months in Las Vegas, a symptom has pushed me to call off, cut short or push back something that really counted.

Item 3. Based on past experience, my manager keeps personal information confidential.

Item 4. Somewhere in my company, at least one senior woman has spoken candidly about menopause, caregiving or her health and faced no visible consequences.

Item 5. My workplace has a documented policy on menopause, health or flexible working that I am able to point to.

Item 6. Looking ahead, I'm not facing a performance evaluation, promotion call or reorganization in Southern Nevada during the next six months.

Item 7. I have a specific accommodation in mind, such as a cooler office, a flexible start or a camera-off option, instead of a general hope for understanding.

Item 8. I trust that the person I would confide in won't repeat it in a room I'm not in.

Item 9. Concealing my symptoms demands more from me than a single honest conversation would.

Item 10. I could summarize my circumstances in two sentences and feel no need to apologize.

Items 1, 2, 7, 9 and 10 measure what the secrecy is taking from you. Statements 3, 4, 5, 6 and 8 help show how safe you would feel stepping away from work if that became necessary. Reliable judgment depends on answering both groups.

Score total

A score of zero to three means keeping quiet is working for you. Concealment is currently cheap for you, the environment is not yet safe enough to disclose, or both are true. Choosing to keep your health private while conditions evolve is a legitimate decision and nothing to feel guilty about.

Four to six: The middle path. Concealment is starting to take a toll, and there is at least one person at work you can trust. This is where many senior women in fact sit, and this band offers the most room to maneuver.

A score of seven to ten suggests that speaking up costs you less than staying silent. Hiding your symptoms now takes more out of you than explaining them would, and the surroundings are favorable enough for you to do it well.

Action plan

A score of zero to three calls for requesting an adjustment while leaving the diagnosis unstated. "I work best with a cooler room and a nine-thirty start on Tuesdays" needs no medical context, and most managers will agree without wanting more.

A score of four to six calls for telling one person on purpose and including a specific request. "I'm managing some menopause symptoms. They're stable, and one change that would make a difference is keeping my camera off for the early calls." That is two sentences with a single request and no apology, and it gives your manager a concrete step to take.

A score of seven to ten means sharing it as plainly as you would any operational update, then getting back to the work. Whatever tone you adopt is the one people around you will tend to adopt too. If your organization lacks a policy, your openness may be what prompts someone to write one.

Your result Bring your result to your chapter group and find out how many women two seats away share your position.